Thoughts Nov. 29 2010

yo I'm getting nowhere fast with everything right now. no school til January 24th. work is slow, barely any hours. and the one i want wants somebody else. i swear my story is repetative. but it's life i live it.

untitled

really tho

i thought about you today. and i needed a blunt. killing mysef trying to be what you want.

March 24 126am

Since I met you
I've been trying to put my thoughts into words
And it never occurred to me that maybe I couldn't
And maybe if I did it would be too much for you
So maybe I shouldn't
I just kept my feelings private
And along the way I got caught up dealing with privates
I thought that it was fate
But it was nothing more than an escape
With the responsibility of getting you off my mind
Seeing as how it was a waste of time even thinking you could be mine
So I continued acting as if everything would be fine
Out of every dollar I broke off their would be 10 dimes
But fuck change
Money can't by anything to stop the heart pains
All it does is wash out the cheap stains
But I realized this and quickly refrained 
Thinking that I should try you again
Girl I want you
And I don't need another friend
so again I sat with paper and a pen
With dreams to woo you
Smile so bright and perfect dimples
Making It look like an artist drew you
Just two of the things that drew me to you
Along with your charisma and your wit
Babe I don't know what it is
But you got it
And I want it
Not all to myself but we can share
Damn if only we could share the same air
Meaning we're close
Damn im so shy
Id prob go ghost
But I promise im friendly
This that kinda shit where you can arrive first
..then me
Get it?
This aint the kinda shit where I just wanna hit it
I want something more
I said it therefore I meant it
And I can say and mean much more
Girl the used to call me Romance,
I'll even open and hold the door
Yeah its like that
I get a message from you and I send one right back
Just so I can get another
Your like no other
And that's just from what I know
Imagine what I'll think when I get to know more
And that's all im trying to do
Im coming 75
The other 25 is on you

Literature

The way shorty speakes to me is deeper than words
Its absurd the way I feel this soon
But like twilight its a new moon
And ima bleed every ounce of happiness from it
Aquitted all my charges 
Im free to go
Just know this some new shit
The way you read pertains to no book
Yet still remains the essence of a masterpiece
Misunderstood like a summer fleece
Or a mourning peace
Yet I wake this morning with peace
The sun hasn't shone like this before
Warming to the core
Deeper than an ocean
Forever staining the the last bit of potion
Waiting on romeos's lips
For juliets last defining kiss
Star crossed lovers
Forever each others

Thoughts 11-16-10

Today me and my nigga corey went over our types. I thought i had given this more thought before but turns out I didn't. I guess my type is as follows.
- Very laid back. yeah we can always go out and have fun and party and shit; but we've got to have those days where we just stay in, chill, whatever.
- Well Spoken. I'm shy if you don't really know me that well. once you do get to know me you realize that I communicate. We don't have to talk about politics but whatever interests you. music, movies, your day, anything really. and yes...sometimes politics. You don't need to know a lot of big words, but i do and we have to keep this convo flowing. we won't just talk but we will actually have conversations.
- Down to earth. I can't really handle a party girl. That's not how i really roll. I don't really like loud people or cocky people. Shallow people get no where with me cause I've got a lot of different types of friends and acceptance is a big part of my personality
- Well-Rounded. I do love Hip-Hop and R&B but Rock is still my favorite. appreciation for different types of music, movies, literature and ideas is a must. I play lacrosse, guitar, bass, a lil violin and I write. if we vibe with any of those, we are golden.

I guess that's about it. I'm hoping there is a woman out there who has put this much thought into her type too. good to know what you want.

Thoughts

I'm starting to think that the only genre i can really write about is the pain and happiness of love. I feel like i am really limiting myself with subject matter. I plan to put together a mixtape soon trying to debut as a rapper; but I'm not sure if i can rap a bout love. I'm really not sure if I can rap at all. Can i be like Common and do spoken word over a beat?  I'm not sure. That is his gimmick. No one does it better. But I've got to do something to get famous. No I don't want the fame. I just want the check that comes along with it. I want to take care of my family and my niggas that have always had my back. Maybe getting noticed a little more wont hurt either. Seems like women only truly see me when I'm writing or performing. After that, I'm a ghost. I'ts funny though because i don't want that attention either. The only girls who's attention I want, I got. Maybe next time it won't be "bad timing"